Im a cold hearted jerk

A disclaimer: You can find dumb ignorant people all over the world, I just happen to live in the Adirondacks of Bulgaria, so I hear alot of interesting things.

So today im visiting Yambul (a nearby city) with some people from Topolovgrad, one of who "speaks" english. We had the following conversation almost completely in bulgarian, and I understood close to 100 percent of it.

The italics are things im thinking in my head as im listening.

1- Hey theres the mosque. Tell Nolan about the mosque.
2- (in english) N O L oooo N.... this is a turkish church, we call it Djamea (mosque)
me (in bg)- thats very nice, it looks very old.
1- thats the largest mosque in Bulgaria.
2- really?
3- are you sure?
1- actually its the biggest in Europe.
2- wow, well it figures, its very big.
3- really?
1- Im positive
3- Im not sure.....
(WTF? are we looking at the same mosque? Thank god 3 has some marbles.)
1- tell nolan about the mosque.
2-(in english) N O L oooo N this is the most ancient djamea in Alllll (insert hand gesture) Evropa. And it is also the largest in Evropa.
(*blank look* where did that come from?)
me - the oldest?
2- oh yes!
me- and largest?
2- oh yes!
me- Oh, I thought the largest djamea in bulgaria was in the Shumen region? (its famous)
3-he's right, that one is very big.
1- No this ones bigger.
2- No N O L ooo N the largest is right here in front of you. (with a voice reserved for 4 year olds) You are very lucky to see this djamea today.
me- And its the oldest in europe?
2- Yes
(I can't ake this any more, these people are just making stuff up!)

(We walk up to the plaque: "constructed in 1844 by the ottoman......" )

I point to the date on the plaque. Its quiet for a second while they read it. Then seeing that they were completely wrong, what do they do? Stand their ground of course.

1- Well that doesn't seem very old.
2- All the other mosques must have been built after that.
(OMG!! They actually believe their own lies)
(At least 3 will get it)
3- Oh, remember there was that earthquake?
(Ahhhhggggggg!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
2- (spoken as fact in english) N O L ooo N this is the oldest djamea in europe, the others where destroyed in an earthquake.
(A pan european earthquake?)
me- Is that so?

I give up, these people can't be beat. 5 minutes latter we are sitting at a cafe and the conversation has moved on. But the mosque is just tearing me up inside. I am one of those people who cant stand it when a fact is wrong, i was going to will this little game and win it in bulgarian. I was gonna be the american, bringing enlightenment and reason. so here it goes.....

me- OK, so i understand that the mosque is the oldest in europe, but there mave to be bigger ones in europe, no?
1- You really like mosques don't you?
me- I more like history (this is my bg)
2- Yes N O L ooo N this is the most oldest of all arab churches (she reverts to this? we already established i know the bg word for mosque) in the whole of europe.
3- The Turks (pretends to spit on the floor) were here longer than anywhere else in europe. Until we threw off the yoke of turkish slavery in 18.......
(Oh no! Not the Turkish yoke again......)
me- (cutting 3 off) But what about the djameas is Turkey? There are djameas in Istanbul that are much older than 1844.
1- Istanbul isn't in europe.
me- really? where is it? ( I havn't got sarcasm down in bg yet, but im trying really hard)
1- Istabul is in turkey.
me- Yes but that part of turkey is in europe.
1- No its not.
(OK, well every nation teaches geography differantly. Letts find out where europe ends and asia starts)
me- so where do europe and asia meet?
3-the border between turkey and bulgaria. (15k from my bed, who knew i was so close?)
me- So when i stand on mt. zacar (behind town) and I look down on bryagnovo (a village on the other side of the valley that is inhabited by bulgarians but is inside turkey) Im looking at Asia?
1- No NO NO NO!!!!! (accompanied my wild hand gestures)
1- Those are Bulgarians!!!
me- Im not talking about the people, im talking about the land, the continent.
2- N O L ooo N I shall explan this to you.... Bulgarians live in europe. Turks (fake spit) live in Asia. I don't know what things they teach you in american schools. This is like yesterday when you tried to tell me that ostriches are from africa not australia. Emu's in australia! hahahaha My children know that emus are from africa and ostriches are from australia. Hahahaha......(pats my head, I kid you not)
(this cant be happening)
me- So where am i right now?
2- right now?
me- right now!
2- A cafe.
me- where?
2- In bulgaria.
me- in Evropa? (spoken with all the contempt i could muster)
2- yes....
Me-No, you have an error (thats how i speak in bg.) Im an american, im in america.
Right here this chair, its part of the american continent. hahahahaah.....

3 chuckles (proving he has some brains) and the other two just stare at me like im insane. I could care less. These people are beyond help (not bulgarians in general, but the backwards ones.) I can take confidence in the fact that their little safety bubble is being eaten up by a modern world order that punishes societies for ignorance and laziness.

I will never fit in here, and im happy about that.